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:永远的痛:

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

五月天-后青春期的诗


五月天 爆肝


五月天 我心中尚未崩壞的地方

我爱你 froze in time on 3/31/2009 02:20:00 PM

Thursday, March 26, 2009

"What really makes me happy?"
I have been thinking this sentence over and over again these few nights.
Till now, I found that my life have been down all the while.
My life have been perfect till 15. Even though I am not rich, not pretty,...not that kind of perfect that all the women/girls desires, but I have happiness. After that year, I live without a heart..till now..and still going on.
Can you believe,..I came out with no friends...i mean FRIEND from the school which i spent 5 years. Thanks to somebody. Ruin everything.
Ever since that person broke every one's heart. That day when truth leaked out. I lost my friends, I lost trust...and really, thanks to that damn person, I, DARE NOT make any friends anymore. No more. Cause now I believe, no friends = no heartbreaking moment.
People will ask me, why not forgive and forget. My answer was, she don't deserve any bit of my forgiveness, anyone may think that it's just a small thing, but I couldn't take it. Till now, it's still in my heart- that pain. I hate her for giving all these that I doesn't deserve, I hate you!
My first relationship started off well..but ended up like shit. My heart shattered for the second time. Then this time was when I realised how much my dad really loves me. Soon, I became Daddy's girl. In addition, this damn year, Dad was diagnosed with last stage of lung cancer. Freaking news to me.
"You know what dad? the scenes of you waking me up every morning seems like it had just happened few days ago. We had our breakfast together everyday, then you'll send bro and me to school. Why, why the hell it's me, why you? Why?! We lived happily together. Why must god take you away? Leaving a permanent pain in me."

2007, I met my current boyfriend - not perfect and in the stage of going worse.
(Sometimes I wonder, how long can we hang on. I don't feel any love anymore.)
Then after a year or so, Daddy passed on, and that's the end of my World.
No one understands me like how dad does.
I feel intense pain every time I think of him.
I regretted a lot.
I tried very hard to be strong because having swollen eyes everyday wasn't fit me, but I just couldn't stop the tears from falling...he's just too important to me.
How can I ever be happy ever again, why can't daddy just bring me along to wherever you go, I am freaking DEPRESSED do you know? I have been suppressing the pain for too long. Jeff just doesn't understand what I really wants. He just don't. I ... have no more space in my heart to keep all this shits. NO MORE.
Stop killing me.
I am feeling down.
Exhausted.


我爱你 froze in time on 3/26/2009 11:20:00 PM

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Today Jeff and I went to T3 for dinner, we stop by the popeye and ordered their set meals. The food,.. I can say.. it's average.., way too average for the price they charged for. For fast food lovers, I don't think it's worth. Compare to the normal fast food restaurant - KFC, I still prefer KFC's chicken than Popeye's. For Fries, still Mc Donald's the best. Only their mash potato tasted better than others. Conclusion : I will never visit their restaurant anymore.
While walking around T3, we saw a toy shop selling Shinnosuke and he bought one for me~ hehe.. he say this will be part of 2nd anniversary's gift. Darn. SS2. That's all for today.


我爱你 froze in time on 3/24/2009 11:43:00 PM

Thursday, March 19, 2009


Yesterday, I went to Pulau Tekong with my mom to see my brother's graduation, while in the boat I happen to see this phoenix-looking cloud just on top of the island. The weather was so hot and the graduation ceremony was kinda boring for me.
Anyway, I guess i wont be going to this island anymore, because I will get seasick while sitting in the boat. Oh, it's dinner time, bye~

































我爱你 froze in time on 3/19/2009 05:35:00 PM

Monday, March 16, 2009


This evening, my boyfriend and I went to PS to watch Marley & Me. Woah, we haven been watching movie together for the past 2 months. The show was average, cos the story line was quite common but the show is meaningful. Marley was so hyper-active which I believe not much people can stand it, like me~

I still prefer to have hamsters as pet. Anyway, when Marley was going to die, many people in the cinema cried,...really loud. Though the part is kinda sad but some people can cried till they walk out the cinema. That's what which surprise me. Hmm, there will be more nicer movies coming soon..awaiting~






我爱你 froze in time on 3/16/2009 11:57:00 PM

Friday, March 13, 2009

‘ 最美的愿望一定最疯狂
我就是我自己的神 在我活的地方
我和我最后的倔强握紧双手绝对不放
下一站是不是天堂就算失望不能绝望 ’
Best lyric ever. Thanks to Mayday..

Just received a email from EA, as expected, the sims 3 is going to launch soon. Oh my, I want!.. but I'm saving money for Mayday's concert in August 2009. Anyway, I haven finish collecting my The Sims 2 expansions,..it's quite expensive to buy one by one. What to say.., it's time to save not to spend~!

我爱你 froze in time on 3/13/2009 11:50:00 PM

Monday, March 9, 2009

Saturday - Sushi making time~
First time making sushi at home... some pictures taken










The End,.. my conclusion was.. I will never make any sushi anymore, it don't really taste as nice as the ones i ate before. Hee, of course la, i am just making for fun.



Today, actually wanted to go for a swim, but when my mom and I want was packing our stuffs, the rain falls. Rain rain rain all day long, irritating. So we change our plan, to the supermarket to buy ingredients for dinner. When we are walking back home, i saw a yellow caterpillar hanging in front my corridor ...



The worm crawl down from my neighbour's plants in the 5th storey. It's the first time I see a yellow caterpillar. Quite nice yeah?.. I mean the color. Hehe..































































我爱你 froze in time on 3/09/2009 04:56:00 PM

Friday, March 6, 2009

My elder brother got his A level result today, hmm, not bad actually, he scored As for his MT, Chemistry, Mathematics and Economics. 4As, i guess this result is way better than mine..if i can see 1 A in my result slip I would have jump to the universe. Hee, this means, it's impossible. Anyway, I am so proud of him, he really done well this time. Dad will be happy for him. Too bad... . ..
Today my mom cooked green bean soup with lots of sago. My favorite~
This pot of green bean soup reminds me the first time i ate daddy's green bean soup. His first time was a failure, it wasn't green bean soup but green bean paste with sago. He added too much beans and sago which led to a green bean paste instead of soup. I was complaining about the "paste" he made, it was too disgusting to consume, in the end, mom had to re-cook another green bean soup to replace dad's.
Dad always boast his fine culinary skills, but i never had a chance to eat any food that he said he can cook. Now i really missed the green bean paste. If i know he will leave us that soon, i should have eaten the whole pot. I would have told him that I love him so much. It's too late.

我爱你 froze in time on 3/06/2009 10:46:00 PM

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

my favorite song - 五月天-夜访吸血鬼





我爱你 froze in time on 3/03/2009 05:28:00 PM

Monday, March 2, 2009

Recently, my inconsiderate neighbour are making my life difficult. Every noon and night, the smell of the damn cigarettes really irritates me. I was unable to open the windows in my room everyday thanks to the idiotic person. This person is really trying to kill all the neighbours who lives near him/her with the second-hand smoke. I really hated smokers! They want to kill themselves, and in the same time, they're harming others too, such selfish acts should be stopped. What can i do to stop my neighbour to avoid smoking around us! Hope that the authority will ban people from smoking in HDB estates, especially after 10pm when people need to sleep! Arghs! I am going mad!

我爱你 froze in time on 3/02/2009 09:54:00 PM


__________________

This is me
`I'M 19
`D.O.B : 09Nov90
`Graduated from BNSS
`Studying In NYP (2nd Yr)
`Diploma of Business Management(Retail)
`In a relationship

'I have lost someone who means a lot to me, from that day, I've been alone in my journey to future. Living in despair, the only reason to live is to fulfill my promises to him.

This Heart is dead ever since.*20.07.2008*

**..His Last Smile..**
> .さ。よ。な。ら
______________________

I just like it!
1. Money!
2. BF
3. Family
4. Handphones
5. Sports =/
_____________________

The Band I'm In Love With
Mayday 五月天
My one and only
Nohara Shinnosuke
__________________

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